The Cheat Sheet

surisburnbook:

The Beckhams have returned to Mother England, looking very casual. (Harper’s still not keen on shoes, I see.)

In the spirit of the holidays, I shall put aside my differences with Harper Beckham and not rejoice in the fact that these dear friends of mine are on another continent right now.

I will also, very politely, link you to this scientific assessment of celebrity children and our spheres of influence.

Spoiler alert: I beat Harper for first.

We’re friends.

We’ve made it.

And it all turned out to be a scheme. Foster is now being charged with 25 counts of grand theft and 10 counts of contracting without a license. 

Foster, who uses a walker, made for one strange defense attorney. He thanked each of his accusers after they testified. On one occasion, he commended a woman for being “truthful and honest and straightforward” after she lambasted him in court. In another instance, he applauded a man “for showing up.” To another, he asked: “You still want the house?”